Friday, May 05, 2006

POLL VAULTING

The Associated Press reports that George Bush's approval rating has sunk to a new all-time low, actually dipping into the negative digits for the first time.

According to Rick Johansson, a polling expert I spoke to this morning, the President's startling -5.6% approval rating means that, "the American people apparently think that George Bush shouldn't have been elected, probably shouldn't have run in the first place, and very possibly should never have entered politics at all."

When I asked Mr. Johansson whether an American President ever recorded a negative approval rating he quickly answered, "no, this is a first of its kind. I'm quite shocked actually. In August, 1980, Jimmy Carter had a 0.00023% approval rating, meaning that exactly one person expressed a positive sense of the presidency. Oddly, as we've discovered from analyzing the data, neither Jimmy Carter, himself, nor his wife, Rosalyn approved of his work as Chief Executive. In fact, his mother Lillian also answered 'no' when asked if she approved of her son's work. Only his brother, the late Billy Carter, voted 'yes,' probably out of deference to the completely undeserved fame he enjoyed due to his brother."

"It's hard to imagine a less popular President than Carter," Johansson added, "but somehow, Bush has alienated every single person living in the country. I can't really explain how he's managed to stay in office."

4 Comments:

Blogger bdodgey said...

That's pretty funny.

It appears even Bush voted against himself in that poll.

11:38 AM  
Anonymous Mike said...

Bush doesn't vote. He just rigs the results. Not sure what happened here.

Poor instructions I guess.

7:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mike:

Negative approval rates??!!

How do you figger, pardner?

It's like, dude, we're not talking integers here where you go past 0 into -1, -2, etc. Are you saying there is a way of scaling a 'negative' approval rate by varying degrees of dislike?

Just a thought. In the olden days, no matter how much I disliked you, it still counted as subtracting from your approval rate until it reached zero, not adding into the 'negative' approval numbers.

Cheers,

Jorge

9:46 AM  
Anonymous Mike said...

What can I tell you, Jorge. The Bush presidency defies even the laws of mathematics.

11:34 AM  

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