BUSH FACES NATION, AND NATION MAKES FACES (EVEN CHENEY)
Which is -- undoubtedly -- very good news for my millions (if not billions) of readers.
Therefore, some brief, disconnected, and mostly useless thoughts about last night:
* Laura looked like one of the NY Giants in those wacked-out, red throwback uniforms.
* Dick Cheney reached down to grab something, which he then put in his mouth, just after Bush spoke about health care. Assuming it was a dose of something on the spectrum from antacid-to-speed-to-heart medicine, I'm wondering who paid for it. Probably the same Federal government that pays his salary. Kinda ironical-like, huh?
* Then, as I'm sure all who watched noticed, Cheney all-but broke into laughter when Bush claimed he wanted to reduce America's gasoline use by 20% in 10 years. I'm telling you, the fat bastard was smirking & fighting the urge to start snickering like a 16 year-old high school boy who's friend passed a note about the teacher's tits.
In fairness, I was laughing too when I heard Bush make that "prediction." But I'm guessing my reasons were just a bit different than Dick's.
* Bush referred -- once - to the problem of "Global Climate Change."
Al Gore, move over! We gots ourselves a new Environmental President! Look out trees, the Chief Exec is coming to hug you.
* Not long before the Lunatic-in-Chief said that "Nothing is more important in our history" than success in Iraq, he very accurately described the cauldron by saying, "Chaos is the objective."
But before we give him the George Washington Golden Cherry Tree Award for Presidential Honesty, I'm duty-bound to inform you that he was talking about "The Enemy" in that instance.
* Speaking of "The Enemy," it's time for the SOTU Word Tally™. You may recall that yesterday I made my predictions, and a small percentage of my millions (if not billions) of readers joined in. First the word, then the actual tally, then my prediction (plus, any & all comments about the predictions of others, complete with snark & derision):
God: 1 (1) -- Who's the Big, Bad Predictin' Mofo here? Huh? HUH??? And someone told me that number was "really low."Damn. I think it's fair to say, I did ok.
Terror/Terrorist: 17 (14) Damn, I over bid. Bob Barker's sending my ass home empty-handed.
Security/Safety: 7 (9) WFTA nailed it. You win the Super Prize™. Check your mailbox, it'll get there . . . sometime. Or not.
Iraq(i): 32 (21)
Iran: 5 (4)
Syria: 2 (2)
North Korea: 1 (actually, a reference to "safety on the Korean peninsula) (2)
Pakistan: 0 (0)
Same-Sex Marriage: 0 (0)
Two Men Exchanging Blow-Jobs: 0 (0)
16 Year-Old Boy Giving a Blowjob to a Congressman: 0 (0)
Two men exchanging erotic massages & a meth pipe: 0 (o)
Hillary: 0 (0)
But, before everyone starts sending me awards, medals, and a contract as a talking head on MSNBC, let's acknowledge that I was too stupid to realize the following words & phrases would also be peppered throughout the address:
Evil/Wicked: 3There. Anyhow, this barrage of loaded words like Terror, Al Qaeda, Iraq, Security, and . . The Enemy, all came in a quick blast in the middle of his speech, before the heart-warming (and stomach-churning) spectacle of "Bush Acknowledges The Heroes" portion of the SOTU address began. Bottom line: he's still banging the war drum, and he's still a shit.
The Enemy: 10
Al Qaeda: 9
Bin Laden: 1
Nuke-ular: 2. John Royal added this word in his predictions. So even though he missed by 150%, he was the only one to call for the word (or, more accurately, the non-word). John, your Super Prize™ is on the way.
* And finally, Jim Webb kicked mountains of ass in his response. Strong, direct, smart, and passionate, Webb not only smacked Bush down resoundingly, but I think he may have thrust himself into the field of '08 Presidential candidates, should he wish to go that route. His closing line:
"Tonight we are calling on this President to take similar action, in both areas. If he does, we will join him. If he does not, we will be showing him the way."Or showing him the door. I'm cool with either.