DEAR GEORGIE: IT'S, LIKE, TOTALLY EMBARRASSING TO SAY THIS TO YOU, BUT . . .

According to news reports, Potentially Insane Iranian President, A-Jhad, has written a letter to George Bush. Deciding to send it through the Swiss Embassy, A-Jhad apparently sent the letter in a "sealed A4-sized envelope addressed to President Bush which [the Swiss] would deliver as soon as possible." Yes, that's correct. He actually sent him "a letter." I wonder if he put cutesy, smiley-faces on the back of the envelope. An Hello Kitty sticker to seal it?

I'm not sure what else to say, actually. So I won't try.

Incidentally, The White House claims it is "unaware" of the letter. If not for the Swiss Embassy's intermediary role, I'd have a slew of US Postal Services jokes ready any minute now. But, alas, I can't change the facts of the story too much.