A PISTOL-PACKING BEAR . . . WHO EATS PEANUT BUTTER & BANANA

In the latest entry from the "Frankly I Don't Think I Can Add Anything" Files, we learn from AP that that a crazed guard dog destroyed a collection of rare teddy bears at a children's museum, including one owned by Elvis Presley. The headline, alone, is worth the price of admission (to this museum, to Graceland, to the kennel, wherever):

Dog Destroys Elvis' Teddy Bear At Museum

To review, that would be: (a) a guard dog, (b) going "berserk," (c) in a children's museum, (d) where it destroyed a collection of rare teddy bears, (e) including the King's.

Come to think of it, maybe Elvis owning a rare teddy bear ain't all that surprising. But the other four facts are perplexing me.