Tuesday, January 02, 2007

ONE OF LIFE'S ETERNAL QUESTIONS ANSWERED

Why am I here? What does it all mean? Who shot JFK? How is it that Chinese restaurants can add anything to your dish for only an additional $1.00? Existential dilemmas? No, these are mere children's riddles!

Among the truly difficult-to-answer questions that haunt men's souls is, "Do I have a drinking problem?" No definitive set of circumstances triggers the "yes" answer. Everyone's different, everyone has his or her own limits, expectations, and obligations.

That said, I think I've found the scenario that qualifies as clear evidence of A Drinking Problem: if you sell your 6 year-old step-daughter's beagle to buy beer . . . then you have a Drinking Problem. No explanations, no excuses, no qualifications. Drinking. Problem.

As explained by Reuters, an unemployed German man:
offered to take [his 6 year-old step-daughter's] dog for a walk and then stopped at a bar where he convinced the owner to buy the 3-year-old dog for 40 euros ($53) . . . [and then] spent the proceeds quenching his thirst for beer.
Even in Germany, I'm guessing that $53 buys a lot of beer. On his next bender, I wonder how many he'll get for selling the step-daughter?

7 Comments:

Blogger Ed in Westchester said...

g-dammit, I was going to use this in the observations.
Bastard. :)

10:22 AM  
Anonymous Kelly said...

Does the handsome little pooch in the picture belong to you?

10:49 AM  
Anonymous Mike said...

I'd like to tell you I'm sorry, Ed.

But I'm not. So I won't.

Kelly - No, there are no pooches in Chateau Mike. And I'm the only handsome little anything here.

But most importantly . . . BUSCH beer? In my house? Tastes like crap, owned by the same family that owns the St. Louis Cardinals, and pronounced the same as you know who? No way.

1:13 PM  
Blogger Comandante AgĂ­ said...

Well, at least he probably got some decent German beer out of the deal, unlike that nasty Busch in the picture.

8:46 PM  
Anonymous Mike said...

The step daughter may get him some fine Belgian ales.

12:00 AM  
Blogger Weaseldog said...

Actually, I think its possible that was my Mom's dog. I got sent that picture years ago, after my sister had thrown a party.

It looked just like the dog they had at the time and they drink cheap beer.

Then again, they may have found a picture with a similar doog and flooring and thought it would be cute to send it out to friends and family...

I might ask sometime...

8:41 AM  
Blogger Weaseldog said...

BTW, Jeff Foxworthy invented this device. Its known as a Redneck Pet Carrier.

4:16 PM  

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