Thursday, April 05, 2007

SHE BELIEVES THE CHILD IS HER FUTURE

And in today's episode of Lose-Lose, we learn that Whitney Houston has won custody of her 14 year-old daughter, fathered by oft-incarcerated pop "star," Bobby Brown. I'm sure the young girl is overjoyed for the opportunity to be raised by her part-time coke-head mother instead of her full-time coke-head Dad. Joy abounds in the Houston family.

And for my favorite quotation, I offer this, straight from the mouth of the lady who warbled that she'll always love him (or was she singing about Costner?):
"He's [Brown] unreliable. If he says he's going to come, sometimes he does. Usually he doesn't."
I guess it's his prerogative.

(Oh, c'mon! You knew I was gonna find a way to get that in there, didn't you?)

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12 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mike, you don't have to post. You're labels say it all.

But, I don't know about Frances Bean. Every now and then, Courtney shows some signs of getting her life together. And I still think that Bobby Brown's life is still more together than Whitney's. So, that Whitney child is in some really some strange territory.

But let's give them all a couple of years. I still think there's a chance than the Britney-K-Fed spawn may have the worst lives of all.

11:10 AM  
Blogger Mike said...

Every now and then, Courtney shows some signs of getting her life together.

I still think that Bobby Brown's life is still more together than Whitney's.


Some radical ideas here, John. Uncharted territory you're cruising into.

the Britney-K-Fed spawn may have the worst lives of all.

Ahhhh, now you're back on dry land. This one'll combine trailer-trashdom with celebri-kid craziness. Fun, fun, fun in 15 years with this one, methinks.

11:13 AM  
Blogger Toasty Joe said...

OK, that perogative line made me laugh out loud. Nicely done.

11:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just want to thank your for that allusion to eighties pop music (which caused me to have an aural AND visual flashback of the "My Perogative" song and video).

11:23 AM  
Blogger Mike said...

Toasty & Kelly -

Thank you, thank you. Take care of the waitresses.

I knew that after nearly a year of doing this, I'd be successful in my pursuit if Teh Funny.

What are my numbers? 1-for-3274?

11:27 AM  
Blogger George said...

When it comes to nature AND nurture, you have to figure the Britney-K-Fed kids' have to be the worst off.

And every time you hear Whitney warble through "I Will Always Love You" just try to remember that Dolly Parton wrote it. Not sure it makes anything better, but it surely makes the world seem even stranger.

12:30 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

Yeah, Briterline can't be blessed with much in the way of strong nucleotides, or whatever it is that makes up DNA. Must be missing a carbon atom or two.

Dolly's actually written a few popular movie tunes, no? She wrote, and sang, "Nine To Five," didn't she?

3:43 PM  
Blogger Noah said...

Paris Hilton is easily still the most fucked-up offspring. Followed closely by Torry Spelling.

4:25 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

Give Francis Bean time. Give. Her. Time.

(And I still say Briterline wins in the end -- sort of the way A-Rod'll make all this handwringing about Bonds passing Aaron moot in the end.)

5:01 PM  
Blogger Marked Hoosier said...

I guess it's his prerogative.

Oh you are going to play THAT way huh? Well Two Can Play That Game. I just guess That's the Way Love Is with Bobby, and that Every Little Step he takes getting on with his life will be tough, so he asks that you Don't Be Cruel. Bobby wanted to work it out, but he decided She Ain't Worth It because literally wasn't any Humpin' Around in their home.

5:57 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

Oh my. I think I'm actually in the presense of a Bobby Brown fan (or are those Whitney songs?)

Oh you are going to play THAT way huh?

Actually . . . I give. Uncle.

6:04 PM  
Blogger Marked Hoosier said...

They were Bobby's songs.

HE. IS. A. GOD.

Ok not really, I was going to do one song, and while checking I surprisingly saw that a few song titles could be used, so I went a little crazy.

Isn't it kinda scary I put more energy into comments than into posts on my own blog??? :)

6:43 PM  

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