A VERY BRIEF QUIZ FOR MET FANS (OR ANYONE ELSE SO INCLINED)

Guillermo Mota has _______.

(a) An ERA over six.
(b) No business appearing in a major league game.
(c) An open-ended invitation to introduce his ass to my steel-toed boot-wearing foot.
(d) Photos of Willie & Omar in a very compromising position with a retarded dwarf named Fred.
(e) All of the above.

Whoever answers correctly wins a spot in the Met bullpen.