Friday, February 08, 2008

FUCKABEE, SCHMUCKABEE, SUCKABEE, YUCKABEE, WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF LUCKABEE

So Romney has dropped out of the race. Too bad -- I enjoyed the double bulls-eye of Mormonism & the name "Mitt." Now McCain's weird gerbil jaw & the obvious (and not-even funny) pun "Fuckabee" are the only two easy go-to's I have left in the arsenal.

Now I actually have to think, get creative, in order to make jokes that none of you'll laugh at anyway because they aren't even remotely funny. This blogging shit ain't easy.

But under the "No Joke Required" category, we now learn from AP that professional asshole & part-time evangelist James Dobson has endorsed Mike Huckabee:
The remaining candidate for whom I could vote is Governor Huckabee. His unwavering positions on the social issues, notably the institution of marriage, the importance of faith and the sanctity of human life, resonate deeply with me and with many others . . . . Obviously, the governor faces an uphill struggle, given the delegates already committed to Senator McCain. Nevertheless, I believe he is our best remaining choice for president of the United States.
Question remains, however, will he he still heart Huckabee if, and when, Maverick McCain tabs him as his running mate. And that question isn't moot; the ability to get out the evangelical vote is a big part of why Old Man John would pick Huckabee. If big time power players like Dobson refuse to back McCain, then the downside of a wacko fundamentalist on the ticket becomes too large.

Hmmmm. Power games galore. Welcome to America, Version 0.8. Where men with views such as this . . . or this . . . or even this, have undue control over the selection process for our national leaders.

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5 Comments:

Blogger Comandante AgĂ­ said...

The armies of compassion will spank children nationwide.

God bless America.

10:47 PM  
Blogger steves said...

It would be so much easier if people were forced to just listen to me and my views.

I also think that Dobson doesn't have as much influence as you believe.

10:45 AM  
Blogger Smitty said...

Dobson represents a vocal minority segment of the Republican party. A dying segment. This Rovian shit is going away, except for thos who have made too much money on it to let it go.

9:56 PM  
Anonymous tony said...

Dobson is too busy showing his penis to his sons to have any real impact on politics any more.

I mean, those boys aren't going to de-gay themselves.

11:59 PM  
Blogger Edwardo said...

McCain is going nowhere beyond the Republican convention. Why? He has run strongest in areas that tend to be Democratic strongholds, and that's just one of his fatal failings. If McCain picks the southern grifter, Hickabee, Smuckabee, etc. as his running mate it won't help him overcome (and may hurt him badly) the fact that his stand on the war will be almost as deadly to his candidacy in the general election as the man's age.

Visualize, if you will, Obama (the Dem candidate barring especial Clinton villainy) against the old, pasty, short, and somewhat crotchety senior citizen Senator from AZ in televised debate, and then try to imagine the last legislator left from the infamous Keating five not getting his old Republican, war loving ass handed to him in the election. Get ready for Obama.

11:30 PM  

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