Wednesday, August 27, 2008

WARNING! A GANG FROM QUEENS N.Y. IS TRYING TO KILL ME

Best to keep your distance. Last night I tried to have a relaxing evening, sitting on the couch, watching the warm glow of cathode ray emissions. And then a wanton mob of white & latin gentlemen wearing blue, white, & orange pajamas came into my home and beat me senseless. Right in front of my wife.

And the worst part? They told me they'd return tonight, threatening to do the same thing one more time.

Much though I like the company of friends & neighbors, probably not a good idea to join me for a couple days. In fact, the situation is so disturbing, so hellish, so violative of norms of acceptable behavior, maybe you shouldn't even attempt to read about this gang from Queens.

Hey, it's your life. You've been warned.

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8 Comments:

Blogger Rickey said...

You know, your talk of gentlemen wearing blue, white, & orange pajamas made Rickey think: at the end of the day, we're all just rooting for laundry. And last night, the laundry was exceedingly stinky.

9:04 AM  
Blogger Deb said...

Laundry, huh? As in, it all comes out in the wash? Well, it did, last night. But, hey, at least it was a TEAM loss, in the truest sense of the word.

9:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hear they'll choke you with a tie.

10:52 AM  
Blogger George said...

As I said at my place, don't worry, no September swoon this year--they'll be finished by August 31 if they play like that.

12:30 PM  
Blogger fridge said...

these guys in pinstripes have been kicking my ass weekly since March.

4:08 PM  
Blogger Agi said...

I heard that game was epic...but for the opposing team's followers.

11:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have you formally apologized to Delgado yet?

4:27 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

Have you formally apologized to Delgado yet?

This doesn't count?

8:06 PM  

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